Looking back on the last year, although it was THE hardest year of our lives, we can't help but also think of it as the year that we've had the most blessings in our lives. All the many things we learned, the people that we have grown closer to, our marriage being strengthened more than we ever thought possible, the miracles we saw in our lives, and most importantly- our testimonies and faith in our Savior and the atonement being grown 10 fold. Although this trial was not desired or loved, and we would not want to go through it again- we still feel grateful for it. Grateful that it wasn't worse, grateful that Jed is still here, grateful for all the amazing support from family and friends that have meant more to us than anyone will ever know, and more than anything grateful to become closer to the Man acquanted with grief. We feel humbled that we have been able to be in His loving arms as He has carried us through this adversity. We know we couldn't have done it without Him. And we wouldn't have been able to better understand the atonement and what he's gone through for us if this hadn't of happened.
Although we have come so far, we still have a long ways to go, and there are times when it seems like we can't get completely through this. I can't believe it's only been 4 months this Thursday that Jed had surgery- it seems like that was years ago! Jed is walking just fine, but when it comes to jumping, skipping, or anything that requires the legs to go anywhere but forward- those muscles are still extremely weak. His arm is also moving, but can only go one direction. The shoulder muscle that is used to rotate the arm, like throwing, swimming, cheering, driving, etc is still not working either. His fingers are moving but very slow and he's going to have to work hard for a long time to get that dexterity back. He's kind of hit a plateau and it's starting to really get discouraging for him. We started P90X this week because Jed is hoping it will speed up his recovery but it has been really difficult for him to do a lot of the things. I'm sure there are so many things that are so hard for him right now that he doesn't even tell me because he never complains. But I can see when the frustration and emotional pain is almost more than he can bare and I can't describe how hard it is to watch this happen to someone you love so much and feel so helpless. I admire him so much and am so proud of him. We also have an appt this month to get an MRI to see if the tumor is still gone and I'm really nervous. So if you don't mind keeping Jed in your prayers to continue to heal and be made whole we would appreciate it so much, and know that they are being answered. Jed is living proof.
As we thought about last year, we also have to say that the highlight was Jed starting his dream career with the Bureau. We feel so blessed and truly feel that the timing was divine. We know the Lord's hand was in that and it has helped us remember to always trust in Him and know that we are on the path that he wants for us at this time. I have never been more impressed and really, I'm without words to descibe the kind of people that Jed works with. We love them and will always be grateful for the amazing support that they have shown to us.
We have really high hopes for this year and are excited have a fresh start again. Some of our goals are to get Jed back to driving and work full time, paintballing, and eventually a complete recovery by the end of the year. He also has a goal to run the St. George marathon. So I guess I'll be coming out of retirement from marathons just for this year! Some of my goals are to do more service, be more organized and on time, find my brain that I lost last year, for us to get out of debt and have all the medical bills paid for, and to find something I'm good at and enjoy and pursue it. Ammon's goals are to be potty-trained, to retire the binky, and to stay out of the dog food. I also hope that we all can have a goal to love more, be more kind towards others, and never take a day for granted. We now have a better understanding of how precious life is.
Thanks again for all your prayers and support, we just can't tell you how much it means to us. We know that 2010 wasn't a hard year for just us, and have seen many people go through some unbelievable trials, including close friends and loved ones. You are in our prayers. We hope that this year will bring you so much peace, joy, happiness, love, healing, and health.
-Missy and Jed
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
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Thank you again for such a wonderful post! I will definately keep Jed in my prayers. I appreciate your openness to share the gospel in your blog. I really needed to read your testimony today. Again, you are such a strong woman and I hope to be able to be as strong as you one day! Keep it up girlie!
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