Well GOOD NEWS everyone! The MRI came back and it looked great- no sign of the tumor! We were so relieved and happy. But I thought that last night I would feel good after the appt went so well, but all I could think about was the next one in 3 months and getting nervous all over again. We both were so scared waiting in there for the doctor and as we were holding hands we could feel eachothers hearts beating. The surgeon said that we'll watch it every 3 months this year, and then every 6 months for the rest of Jed's life. I'm having a really difficult time with this right now because its so scary every time, and I don't know how I'm going to deal with this the rest of my life. I will have to find some way to cope and stay calm or I will be a stress basket! I looked up natural ways to heal or prevent cancer and got even more overwhelmed by all the things you need to do, and how everything we eat and drink are are so bad for us. There's so many different things to do and I wish I knew which one works! We went to the health food store and got some things, and got even more discouraged with how exspensive everything was. The only thing that gives me comfort is just remembering to trust in the Lord. I just have to remember that we are in His hands- but there are times when the thought of the tumor coming back is too much to bear and I feel like crumbling into pieces.
Sorry- I know this is supposed to be a happy post and we're really trying to stay positive. We're so grateful for Jed's progress and the doc is confident in Jed that he'll have a complete or near complete recovery on his left side.
Some of the new things he is doing is jumping, not as high as before but looking so good! He also is starting to throw now, which also isn't like his normal throw but he's able to release the ball, which is so great since he used to have to pry his fingers open after gripping something. His shoulder is getting more movement and the therapist said that the strength and balance in his legs is completely back- it just has some flexers that won't let him do certain things. They said to keep working at it. He can also type with both hands but very slow. It takes a lot of concentration to move each finger, but its so exciting! The doctor told Jed that he sees the most success in patients that work hard and exercise- which Jed has been doing, and we're seeing little things everday! It's also a good thing that he's left handed so that he's kind of forces to use it again. I can't tell you enough how proud of him I am. He is a rock, and we realized that he has kind of preparing his whole life for this trial. He has been a gym guru as long as I've known him and knows how to work hard, and is very knowledgable with the muscles in the body and what work outs and weights help strengthen the things he needs.
Thank you everyone so much for your prayers- I just can't thank you enough. If there's anyone that is need of prayers from us, please let us know. We know that prayers are answered and want to repay as many people as possible that have kept us in their prayers. And thank you to those that have given us suggestions for natural cures. We are going to look into all of them and appreciate as many success stories as possible! Thank you and God bless!
-Missy
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Happy New Year!
Looking back on the last year, although it was THE hardest year of our lives, we can't help but also think of it as the year that we've had the most blessings in our lives. All the many things we learned, the people that we have grown closer to, our marriage being strengthened more than we ever thought possible, the miracles we saw in our lives, and most importantly- our testimonies and faith in our Savior and the atonement being grown 10 fold. Although this trial was not desired or loved, and we would not want to go through it again- we still feel grateful for it. Grateful that it wasn't worse, grateful that Jed is still here, grateful for all the amazing support from family and friends that have meant more to us than anyone will ever know, and more than anything grateful to become closer to the Man acquanted with grief. We feel humbled that we have been able to be in His loving arms as He has carried us through this adversity. We know we couldn't have done it without Him. And we wouldn't have been able to better understand the atonement and what he's gone through for us if this hadn't of happened.
Although we have come so far, we still have a long ways to go, and there are times when it seems like we can't get completely through this. I can't believe it's only been 4 months this Thursday that Jed had surgery- it seems like that was years ago! Jed is walking just fine, but when it comes to jumping, skipping, or anything that requires the legs to go anywhere but forward- those muscles are still extremely weak. His arm is also moving, but can only go one direction. The shoulder muscle that is used to rotate the arm, like throwing, swimming, cheering, driving, etc is still not working either. His fingers are moving but very slow and he's going to have to work hard for a long time to get that dexterity back. He's kind of hit a plateau and it's starting to really get discouraging for him. We started P90X this week because Jed is hoping it will speed up his recovery but it has been really difficult for him to do a lot of the things. I'm sure there are so many things that are so hard for him right now that he doesn't even tell me because he never complains. But I can see when the frustration and emotional pain is almost more than he can bare and I can't describe how hard it is to watch this happen to someone you love so much and feel so helpless. I admire him so much and am so proud of him. We also have an appt this month to get an MRI to see if the tumor is still gone and I'm really nervous. So if you don't mind keeping Jed in your prayers to continue to heal and be made whole we would appreciate it so much, and know that they are being answered. Jed is living proof.
As we thought about last year, we also have to say that the highlight was Jed starting his dream career with the Bureau. We feel so blessed and truly feel that the timing was divine. We know the Lord's hand was in that and it has helped us remember to always trust in Him and know that we are on the path that he wants for us at this time. I have never been more impressed and really, I'm without words to descibe the kind of people that Jed works with. We love them and will always be grateful for the amazing support that they have shown to us.
We have really high hopes for this year and are excited have a fresh start again. Some of our goals are to get Jed back to driving and work full time, paintballing, and eventually a complete recovery by the end of the year. He also has a goal to run the St. George marathon. So I guess I'll be coming out of retirement from marathons just for this year! Some of my goals are to do more service, be more organized and on time, find my brain that I lost last year, for us to get out of debt and have all the medical bills paid for, and to find something I'm good at and enjoy and pursue it. Ammon's goals are to be potty-trained, to retire the binky, and to stay out of the dog food. I also hope that we all can have a goal to love more, be more kind towards others, and never take a day for granted. We now have a better understanding of how precious life is.
Thanks again for all your prayers and support, we just can't tell you how much it means to us. We know that 2010 wasn't a hard year for just us, and have seen many people go through some unbelievable trials, including close friends and loved ones. You are in our prayers. We hope that this year will bring you so much peace, joy, happiness, love, healing, and health.
-Missy and Jed
Although we have come so far, we still have a long ways to go, and there are times when it seems like we can't get completely through this. I can't believe it's only been 4 months this Thursday that Jed had surgery- it seems like that was years ago! Jed is walking just fine, but when it comes to jumping, skipping, or anything that requires the legs to go anywhere but forward- those muscles are still extremely weak. His arm is also moving, but can only go one direction. The shoulder muscle that is used to rotate the arm, like throwing, swimming, cheering, driving, etc is still not working either. His fingers are moving but very slow and he's going to have to work hard for a long time to get that dexterity back. He's kind of hit a plateau and it's starting to really get discouraging for him. We started P90X this week because Jed is hoping it will speed up his recovery but it has been really difficult for him to do a lot of the things. I'm sure there are so many things that are so hard for him right now that he doesn't even tell me because he never complains. But I can see when the frustration and emotional pain is almost more than he can bare and I can't describe how hard it is to watch this happen to someone you love so much and feel so helpless. I admire him so much and am so proud of him. We also have an appt this month to get an MRI to see if the tumor is still gone and I'm really nervous. So if you don't mind keeping Jed in your prayers to continue to heal and be made whole we would appreciate it so much, and know that they are being answered. Jed is living proof.
As we thought about last year, we also have to say that the highlight was Jed starting his dream career with the Bureau. We feel so blessed and truly feel that the timing was divine. We know the Lord's hand was in that and it has helped us remember to always trust in Him and know that we are on the path that he wants for us at this time. I have never been more impressed and really, I'm without words to descibe the kind of people that Jed works with. We love them and will always be grateful for the amazing support that they have shown to us.
We have really high hopes for this year and are excited have a fresh start again. Some of our goals are to get Jed back to driving and work full time, paintballing, and eventually a complete recovery by the end of the year. He also has a goal to run the St. George marathon. So I guess I'll be coming out of retirement from marathons just for this year! Some of my goals are to do more service, be more organized and on time, find my brain that I lost last year, for us to get out of debt and have all the medical bills paid for, and to find something I'm good at and enjoy and pursue it. Ammon's goals are to be potty-trained, to retire the binky, and to stay out of the dog food. I also hope that we all can have a goal to love more, be more kind towards others, and never take a day for granted. We now have a better understanding of how precious life is.
Thanks again for all your prayers and support, we just can't tell you how much it means to us. We know that 2010 wasn't a hard year for just us, and have seen many people go through some unbelievable trials, including close friends and loved ones. You are in our prayers. We hope that this year will bring you so much peace, joy, happiness, love, healing, and health.
-Missy and Jed
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